Beyond no treatment for those on that final walk..

Beyond No Treatment Written for those on that final walk

It's an art living between the rain drops in the moment with a person who has just found out there is no more treatment. I never quit believing that Mike would beat the odds yet I prepared for the worst. However, in our home .. there was no talk of doom and gloom.. the rule was leave the medical stuff outside the door... this was when we were told he had six months to live... the first month was horrible as he laid around in self pity... till finally well, I told him get his butt up ... and live... and he laughed at me and said "damn,girl" then ok... and off we went through the next 3 1/2 months. At night while I worked he pumped out the messages... love u2 was the most frequent...of course that was after I had to give him  "text" lessons... but he was learning.. laughing.. and loving... in the midst of the rest... the inevitable.. every morning I would pray as I cracked open the front door that he would be alive and every morning he would holler out... I'm still alive... I would sigh a deep breath... and leave the uncertainty at the door... finally  one day... I cracked open the door... and there was no answer.. we were going to the doctor for a paracentisis procedure to remove fluid... I raced to his room...his eyes told it all... I can't get up...he said.. even then his eyes locked with mine... we knew... he knew... it was only 24 hours.. pneumonia, kidney failure, and blood pressure crashed... he fought with the mask they had on him... I asked the doctor if it could be removed safely ... it was simply oxygen not a tube... they took it off... and Mike insisted on it being taken off... his heart crashed...pulse slowed... breathing followed...I had 1 second to tell this man I loved he was dying... I had another to tell him... I love you and with his last breath.. his eyes locked on mine he said "love u 2"  the secret was the walk... the secret was for those moments between his despair and that last love u 2 there was quality of life... he loved...laughed.. and lived in the moment... We were blessed to share the moments of our lives...